3 Things You Can Control Every Single Day

Take Back Control of Your Workday With These 3 Easy Tips

Do you ever feel like nothing goes right from the second you try to get out the door? Then you get to the office and it feels like your whole day is being run by everyone except you. If that is you, take a breath. You have more control than you think. Not over everything, but over the three things that actually shape how your day goes.

After 30 years in the workforce, hiring, promoting, and coaching professionals, I can tell you the people who thrive are not the ones with the easiest circumstances. They are the ones who get clear on what is theirs to control and pour their energy there instead of into the things that are not. Here are the three.

1. The words you say

Words are powerful, and you control every one of them. What you say to the people around you leaves a mark, so kindness goes a long way, even on the days a coworker, a colleague, or your boss is driving you up the wall.

Here is the part worth sitting with. Even when someone has not earned your kindness, staying steady is not weakness. It is strength. Anyone can snap. It is easy to give in to the emotion and fire back. It is much harder to face a frustrating moment with dignity and respect, and that is exactly what makes it powerful. Superstars show up when things get stressful. Carry yourself with respect and you will command it in the room.

Now the words that matter most: the ones you say to yourself. If you wake up running late, do not pile on with "I am always late, what a mess." That does nothing but drag your whole day down before it starts. Swap the criticism for a question. What would help me get out the door sooner? Maybe it is an earlier bedtime. Maybe it is thinking of tonight as the start of tomorrow instead of the end of today. Talk to yourself the way you would talk to someone you are rooting for, because you are.

2. The actions you take

The steps you take are yours to choose, and a lot of them happen before your workday even begins.

For me, that starts with a morning routine. My name may be Dawn, but that is not because I love waking up early. Still, I learned that if I gave myself a little self-care first, my coffee, my journal, a show nobody else in my house wants to watch, I got to work refreshed instead of frazzled. When I was a single mom for many years, that routine was the difference between arriving at my wit's end and arriving ready. If your mornings are hectic, get to bed a little earlier, get up a little earlier, and build in the self-care that keeps you human.

The same logic applies to the things you cannot fully control, like a commute. You cannot prevent an accident on the highway. You can buffer your time so a delay does not wreck your morning, and you can decide what happens in that car. I used to download mystery audiobooks from the library and get so hooked that I almost did not mind traffic, because I wanted to find out what happened next. I could not control the drive. I could control the experience of it. Look for those spots in your own day where a small choice changes everything.

3. The effort you make

You always know when you are coasting and when you are giving it everything. The effort you bring is fully in your hands.

When a task feels overwhelming, notice what you do. Do you quietly give up? Do you stay silent about the part you were never trained on because you assume you are supposed to already know it? Speak up and set that boundary, or you will not get the support you need. On the flip side, do not get stuck redoing the same thing over and over in a perfectionist loop. Effort means showing up fully, not spinning your wheels.

And here is the line I come back to constantly: you are responsible for the effort, not the outcome. Give it your all, then let the chips fall where they may. Let your work ethic be your resume. When you consistently bring that kind of effort, the right people notice. In my whole career I have held only four jobs, and two of them were offered to me by my boss's boss's boss. Not because I am more special than anyone else, but because I had built a reputation for handling challenges with enthusiasm, dignity, and respect. That is a brand you can build too.

Why this matters

People do not usually leave jobs because of the work itself. They leave because they do not feel valued, or because friction with a boss or a coworker festers until it takes over. When you concentrate on what you can control, the words you say, the actions you take, and the effort you make, your workday starts to turn around. And a good workday does not stay at work. It spills into your home, your mood, and the people you love. You start to realize just how much of your day was in your hands all along.

Want a head start? I created a free cheat sheet called "When Your Office Is Driving You Nuts," and it is your underground playbook for having a good day at work no matter what is going on around you. And if you would like a partner as you take your career to the next level, our consultations are always free. Book one at drdawnshoptalk.com/private-coaching.

You do not have to take this journey alone.